The IM Dance
Aaron C., 18-year-old guy
“When Leslie broke up with me, I was devastated. We had been together for almost a whole year and I was really into her. I guess it would be honest to say that I loved her. I had never felt that way about a girl before. She is smart, cute, hot and fun to be with. We like a lot of the same things and were both on the swim team at school until I graduated this year. My parents really liked her and I got along with her mom (her parents are divorced and her dad lives in another city).
There were little signs along the way that she wasn’t happy, but I just ignored them. I figured everything would be okay in the long run and it wasn’t worth getting worked up about. So, when she broke up with me, I saw that a relationship can’t be put on auto-pilot. I didn’t put enough effort into it and I didn’t let her know how I felt about her.
We broke up in July of this year. Four months after we broke up, I got into a car accident. I was okay, but my car was totaled. She found out about it and sent me an Instant Message to see how I was. Three weeks after my accident, she got into a small accident and her car’s rear bumper was dented. Then it was my turn to Instant Messaged her. She said in that last IM session that we should hang out some time and then signed off before I could reply.
The fact is, I miss her a lot. I’ve gone on two dates with two other girls in the past couple of months, but these girls don’t even compare to her. I’ve learned my lesson and I know that a good relationship is worth the effort. I want to hang out with her, but realize that I don’t want to be just friends. The next time we IM, I’ll let her know that I still love her and only want to hang out if she is open to that.
It’s weird how sometimes we have to lose someone before we realize how important they were to us.”
